Will I ever tell her the truth?

A fine winter morning is like a glimpse in paradise. The most favorite time to enjoy the nature but for me, the holidays are meant for a late morning. The pleasure indeed is blossomed in the warmth of the blanket but the completeness is always felt when the morning dreams are the splashes of the undying memory of that person.

The casual talks are going on in the college corridor and suddenly I happen to meet her, I smile and she smiles back, I say, “Hey I know it is your free lecture so can I just talk to you for a second, it is very important?” She simply nods without speaking a word and I, all of a sudden get down to my knees, holding her hand I pull out a silk and I say starring right in her eyes, “I love you”.

The shock of the confession wakes me up. Some things in life are to be connected by the thread of nothingness but yet you feel very insecure about the assurance of it. We met since the first day and it has been two years but, the thing is we talk, we laugh, we flirt, and yet I don’t want to test the feelings by incarnating the ‘L’ word in our relationship. I fetched my mobile and sent a text to her, desperate for a reply, “Good morning dear!” But my mind was pushing my emotions too hard to replace ‘dear’ with ‘love’ in the text. I again submerged in an emotional pool, thinking about the consequences of my proposal… What if she refused? Or what if she just exchanged the gesture and made her confession that she loves me too? But how can a human being possibly know the insides of her brain.

My thoughts were flickered by a text from her and the adrenaline rush made me grab the phone, “Hey good morning dear!! Or I should rather say good noon in half an hour….” I asked myself, ‘Is it worth talking the risk?’ And from nowhere I was driven by my emotions and I was writing a text saying: ‘I wanna tell you something from so long but never had the courage, so now I wanna tell you: ‘I LOVE U DEAR’ but the subconscious snapped at the peak moment and the send button was never pressed. The text became a draft and I replied to her, ‘Ya, you know me, I m a sleeping beauty’. After I sent the text I got lost in the perpetual cycle of thoughts and the question made me anxious, ‘Will I ever tell her the truth?’


Viral Soni

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