The twelfth entry

Hi diary,

I broke it. Again.  Can you imagine? I broke the replacement phone I was using! Technically, it wasn’t my mistake. A hole in my pyjama’s pocket- sounds incredibly stupid, doesn’t it?  An hour of resenting made me decide to fund myself a new phone, saving up from my allowance.

I have friends, I have my family to talk to, but then sometimes it feels lonely. A different kind of lonely altogether, when you do not want to talk to anyone, nothing pacifies, not even you. Yesterday was one of those days, and the resolve was to just walk off, impromptu. I walked about to the main road ahead, and found a small bench to sit on, listening to some tragic songs.  The haze of the yellow streetlight and the slight chill were making the busy place seem silent. I looked around, some friends chatting and laughing, a couple having ice cream at the corner shop, an old shopkeeper shutting his shop down- all of this made me pensive and then I broke into a faint smile. The world that you see around, the people are all yours to decipher. Watching people do their work, watch them talk, laugh, play, walk, every person’s own tempo, thoughts, behaviour – everything of it makes you think of the kind life you have got, how you look to a third eye. We make it so small: Five subjects with their passing marks, some friends, a crush, and a dozen of series to watch.  Life is so much beyond it. I felt better, well a kind of inspired you could say. I called mom to apologise for my reasonless anger half an hour back and bought myself a cup of coffee.

I walked back, playing better songs, smiling to myself and preparing myself for the night’s task. The war has begun my friend; it’s the journal writing time.

Scribbling away,

Anushka.

 

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